


Mirage

by abetternameneeded



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-06
Updated: 2020-11-06
Packaged: 2021-03-09 05:15:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 753
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27409447
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/abetternameneeded/pseuds/abetternameneeded
Summary: Alice hallunicates while in the tower.
Comments: 2
Kudos: 3





	Mirage

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Intothewickedwood (zacobyz)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/zacobyz/gifts).



Tik tok. Tik tok. The clicking of the clock reminded her of every passing hour. Every passing minute. Evrey passing second. The time seemed to drudge slower after each tick. And then even slower. Like nothing would ever be able to move again. But everything could move. She could move. She felt heavy. She was in a weird daze sometimes. And sometimes she couldn't stop doing things. She never knew which it would be. 

Some days she'd wake up and run herself to the cold srone tiled ground trying to ignore that she was alone. Trying to ignlre that she was trapped. Trying to run from her probelms when she had nowhere she could run to. But other days she didn't even get out of bed. Or she took hours to even bother. What was the point? Papa was gone. And she was alone. And she was always exhausted. But she couldn't sleep. And her stomach hurt a lot but she had to eat. What was that called? Confusing. It was called confusing. There was a different word for it, wssm't thdre?  
She asked her quesrion out loud. The silence made everything worse. So she talked. Sometimes at least a bird flapped its wings in response. Or chirped a song at her. 

"It's called a paradox, starfish." Papa? No. He was gone. Not dead. Gone. Somehow it felt worse. She knew he was out there but didn't know if she'd ever see him again. And her wrist burned sometimes. Not as much as when they'd touched but sometimes it'd hurt.

"Papa!" She wanted to hug him. She stepped back. She couldn't. 

"It's okay. You're okay." 

"I'm not," Alice shook her head, tears welling in her eyes. She wasn't okay. Nlt in any sense lf the word. She felt awful almlst all the time. She barely slept. She coukd hurt him. She was struggling and there was nlthing she could do. 

Papa would normally comfort her. But he couldn't. He was here now but he couldn't confort her. He grew weaker every moment. 

"You need to go. I don't want to hurt you." The words hurt her. She hated this. She didn't understand why the witch had done this. Aye, he'd made a mistake. But he'd tried to fix it. 

"It's better." That's exactly what she wanted to hear. Of course it was. Every conversation she had with anyone or anything at this point was what she wanted to hear. There was no one else. Sometimes she realkzed this but not always. It got so hard. Sonetimes she let the pretend last long enlugh she thkught itbwas real. It hurt when she remebered it wasn't. 

"Can we play chess? Just for a little while." She was started to rememever that it didn't make sense. She hadn't heard or swen him walk in. And she had always been sensitive to those things. There was so little to hear she heard almlst everything. But if it could last a moment longer. And then another and another. Maybe it'd feel real enough that she wouldn't feel so alone. 

"Sure. As long as you want." 

She knew rhat wasn't true. Or she would realize that once the mirage faded. But she felt something off ablut him. She always did. But itbwas as close as she could get. 

Alice fellnasleep at her board. And woke up the next morning. Dazed at first but then she remebered parts lf the day before.  
"Mr. Rabbit, mist be seeing things again. What day are we on now? Mayve i should mark them sonehow? Ot feels like it's been years. I miss papa. I really miss him." She sat down again, needing a moment to collect her thoughts. And there was no shortage of moments. Even if a lot were a blur. She shook her head and let out a sigh after tapping her hands on the table for a while. What to do? What to do?  
She knew she'd hallucinated papa. Had he actually been there he would've been hurt but she missed him. And she longed for him.  
So her life continued in its broken routine. Some days she slept and some days she didn't. Some days she was completly alome amd others she could swear the toys were talking or that papa was there but then her mind woukd find its way back to reality and she'd feel the pain of losing papa all over again. And she'd hope that one day she'd see him again and she'd be free.


End file.
